The thought of you once set my heart aflutter
But now all I feel is cold, hard pain
The kind that makes me clutch my chest
Cradle the hollow part of me
Where once held my most sacred treasure
Before I gave it away
I am left to collect what I can
In hopes of returning it to its former state
A futile hope.
How could someone that once brought me nothing but joy
Now send only shards of glass and ice into my soul
Now I shut you out after being foolish enough to let you in
To preserve what is left of me.
I became used to feeling vulnerable in your arms
Now I’m left weak in the ashes.
You did not understand the difference between the two
To be honest
Neither did I
But now I do
Cold truths and harsh lessons have taught me as much.
And again I wonder
How could I let this happen?
Let in something so sweet
Then realize it was rotten
Infecting my everything.
So drunk I was unable to read the signs
See the warnings
High off something I did not understand
You spoonfed me malignance
Mislabeled as care.
I have so many questions for you
Things I can’t ask and nothing you can answer
But only one for myself
“How could I have been so foolish?”
It resounds in the deepest recesses of my mind
Again and again
Although I suspect I’ll never truly know.